Woke up this morning at around 8 but stayed in bed till 9:30 – felt really good! Didn’t see girls this morning – they r so good not to wake me up! But, I wouldn’t know, I couldn’t hear them yelling if I wanted to! My hearing has gotten so bad I could only hear a soft monotone buzz in my ears and I can no longer hear myself talk so I don’t know how loud I’m talking! My mom writes down stuff she says/asks on my dryerase board cuz I can’t understand her but I still try to answer verbally hopefully saying it loud enuf! Just got in the car to go to radiation! Like I said, it takes longer in the car than the actual radiation! Sean should be coming home tonight, as long as the weather cooperates! Hope today is a good day! Will post later!
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Just took a bath with my mom’s help! Don’t realize how much it means to get help! I think a couple times, if my mom wasn’t there, I would’ve lost my balance since I got so dizzy in the water! Who knows if I could’ve bumped my head or fallen into the water!?! It feels good though after getting out of the water -fresh and clean! Just gotta realize the water isn’t stable so I need to be very careful! Today was a pretty uneventful day – Kandice came home early for her modified school schedule (Wed she goes 8-12:25) so I spent some time this afternoon with her doing homework b4 Jillian came home! Went back and fourth with my e-mail buds! Thanks, it keeps me busy! Before dinner, the girls got in a spat about something and I couldn’t do anything about it so I just told them to both not complain and it seemed to work! Just wish I could hear what they were arguing about? Probably something that doesn’t make sense to us adults anyway – it always seems the case! This age is challenging but has it’s rewards – hopefully my hearing will get better so I can cherish them more! Good night all! Hopefully I will sleep better tonight!
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It’s 2:30 in the morning and I woke up hungry and having to go to the restroom – not usual! I can’t go back to sleep for some reason – not sure why? I didn’t overly rest today so not sure -I’ve been a pretty good rester these last few weeks so don’t know why tonite is difficult – maybe knowing Sean isn’t right next to me protecting me (even though my mom is next door and his dad is across the hall still isn’t the same). I think I’m hungry since I ate dinner at 5pm and I guess 7 hours is a long time from having something to eat so I just munched on some rice chips I have on my nightstand and drank some water -hopefully that will do it! But I was interested to see I had a couple messages on my Blackberry which always puts a smile on my face unless it’s an ad for something I don’t need right now! Well, now that I got something in my stomach and used my brain for something, I’m getting tired again! Thought this might work! Good night, everyone!
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Even in all its craziness, today didn’t turn out too bad – just hope the girls don’t wake up to a crazy dream cuz I can’t hear them -hopefully I have the audio monitor on loud enough for my mom or Sean’s dad to hear! Sean was still here this morning so it went pretty smooth! Sean’s flight was @ 2:20 from LAX and he just texted me he landed in Orlando just a bit ago after a layover in Atlanta! His trip home should be nonstop so hopefully it will be much nicer! This afternoon, my mom picked up Kandice, she came home, had a snack, and we did her homework then, she went with my mom to pick up Jillian. My mom made dinner for the girls – Sean’s Dad came back from the hospital just after 5 to spend time with the girls so it was nice! I can’t hear the girls so when they argue in front of me, I can’t understand what they are arguing about so I just say, “Sorry, girls, Mommy can’t hear so I can’t help u”. It’s worse cuz I can’t read their lips, especially when they are probably mumbling at the same time AND my vision has gotten worse (I have more nystagmus where my eyes really bounce around) so I can’t focus! I can’t play the ref right now and just try to just nip it at the bud! That’s the most difficult part of this is trying to raise two little girls who don’t really understand what’s going on!
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Yesterday was the beginning of this whole new week of craziness! As per regular schedule for me, I had my usual 10:45 radiation appt. But today is the beginning of a few changes we have to accommodate for – hopefully just for this week. Sean’s mom went in for surgery for her neck yesterday so she won’t be playing a major care taker role -actually his dad has to step in to be her care taker to make sure she’s fine! She’s still in the hospital recuperating and hopefully healing well! My mom is here for the week to help me and the girls! She’s actually picking up Kandice right now! Then she will bring her home, homework, then pick up Jillian b4 or after starting dinner! I took my morning nap already but may forego the afternoon one depending on how the girls are! Sean left for FL for a convention and will be back late Thursday night! I’m sitting up in bed just waiting for my mom to bring Kandice home -I’m getting a little hungry (barely ate lunch since I had a late breakfast)! So, gonna go downstairs carefully since I’m so dizzy so I can get a quick bite to eat!
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