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Mom’s Help

by on June 22, 2009

Now that my Parent’s are leaving this weekend, we have had to make some plans.  Far from the ideal but plans that address all of our needs nonetheless.

On the surface, our plans are fairly simple:  Satomi’s Mom is going to drive from their home in La Palma and help get Satomi and the girls dressed, take them all to school/work, and then she returns home.

Actually, it’s much more than that.  On dizzy days, Satomi needs help moving around the room, taking a shower, getting dressed, etc.  She tries to be self-sufficient but bad days are not predictable.  There’s also days of depression; These are the days she needs her Mother.

Admittedly, our plans are selfishly focused around Satomi.  Mom is typical old-school Japanese and will work till she drops.  When Satomi and I approached her for help, she agreed immediately.  Mom has a high blood pressure problem likely stemming from her continual worry about several people in their family including Satomi and Dad.

Dad has a serious chronic lung problem.  He is on continuous oxygen and has faced death on several occasions.  After a long period of waiting, the Doctors refused him a lung transplant because they questioned his ability to survive the transplant.  The entire family was upset.  Satomi took it upon herself to care for her Dad and provided daily physical therapy; She took a leave from work.  During treatment she had to resuscitate him on at least one occasion.  Over the months of care she provided, the transformation was amazing but it was not without cost.  

Over that long period, Satomi spent more time with her Dad than she did with Kandice, Jillian, and me.  I was seriously upset because it was my Parent’s and I that had to offset the baby care that she was not there to provide.  I had to give her an ultimatum before things changed.  A few months later, they found the breast cancer.

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