Just finished having my morning smoothie with all my supplements and some soup for breakfast! Yesterday morning was busy but glad it’s over! Woke up around 8 this morning – got dressed, made smoothie and mom reheated some soup (yum warm!!) Since my smoothie was so cold (frozen berries, ice) it was a good contrast! Now, just sitting on the couch downstairs waiting to go to radiation – we have a housekeeper friend who comes over every other Tuesday to clean our house (bathrooms, dust, vacuum) since I really don’t have the time or energy – well worth it since it is so important to keep clean! She comes for a few hours and also goes to my mom’s/sisters to clean every other Friday! She also makes some good food (tamales, taco’s, etc.). Really great Christian people! When her daughter is out of school – she brings her along to help like today -she’s very mature for middle school age! Just hanging out waiting – can’t hear a thing – just dead air! This afternoon, I have an appt with my oncologist so we’ll see – I want to know if this is “curable” – just so miserable!
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Finally, done with my 2 appts for the day and it’s only 10:40am!! Really tired though! Need to go home to nap! Still need to watch what I eat – more organic vegatarian with some chicken/fish but not as strict – probably for next 6 months at least! As long as I have more options now, I can do ok! I’m so overwelmed with this dizziness, headache! I need to go home and rest now!
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Just like most of you, we put together an annual Christmas family newsletter. In many instances, it is the only form of “consistent” communication that we have with everyone. I’ve never been big on writing letters, even after the invent of E-mail, I still don’t do it much. No sure why but I’m sure laziness plays some part.
It’s December 20th already and I have not put fingers-to-keyboard. Last year, I took weeks and dozens of drafts just so it wouldn’t sound fatalistic in some manner. I ended up just cutting out anything questionable and focusing on our girls.
This year I have no Christmas cheer whatsoever. I put lights on the house and got a Xmas tree solely because of Kandice and Jillian-They remain happy and excited and full of Xmas wonder and don’t deserve a bleek Holiday.
I just cannot bring myself to spin this year in a positive light. I know I have to stay optimistic but things just aren’t that good. Saying anything else would be lying to all of you.
Sorry about my negative rant. No one else should feel this way this time of year. One way or another, I’m going to write that newsletter.
12/22/2010 Update: I apologize to all of you that come here thinking that I posted our 2010 Xmas Newsletter. As not to mislead you, I changed the title of the post. I decided to take the advice of several people and omit the text altogether. I’m assembling a collage of recent photos taken of the girls. Its probably going to miss Xmas but at least it’s coming together.
Just left for Costa Mesa – cold outside and just took my meds with food so really dizzy anf headache! Warming up in the car -still really tired!
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Got up around 4 am having to go to the bathroom and have been tossing/turning in bed since! Forgot to prep my meds for the week so decided to at least do my partial morning meds (just took the ones I don’t need to have food with) and after my mom comes to wake me up, I will ask her to help me with the rest! I can’t even stand still without holding on to anything anymore – tried to pull up my underwear in the bathroom and had to hold on the bar with one hand while I pulled them up with my other! Also almost fell while standing there for a second! It’s only 5:30am and I feel like it’s really earlier (2am) this dizziness really makes me tired! I can’t take my steroids till I eat something so will be dizzy for a while! Mom’s gonna wake me up @7:45 so I can get to my 9am appt in Costa Mesa!
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