Recommendation: Parking

So my “attendance” post basically said “want a seat, get there early”.  This post is going to say “want a parking spot, get there earlier”.

The church has nicely arranged lot of about 100 spaces.  If four people arrive in each car, that’s 400 people-Wonderful!  But that’s just not realistic.  If it was, there would be three or four carpool lanes on the freeway, not just one.

So what do you do?  Here’s the deal.

The church is providing two parking attendants.  They’re not valet’s so don’t jump out and throw them your keys.  They’re not insured to drive your car so they’re just going to let your keys hit the floor and start laughing at you.  The attendants job is to cram as many cars into that lot as physically possible.  Besides each space, that’ll also include along the buildings, along the fence, under the basketball hoops, everywhere.  Just follow their instructions without hitting anything.  If you do, they’ll deny everything and again, laugh at you.

There are some stacked parking spaces that we’ll try to fill with family members so the likelihood of leaving at the same time is much greater.  If it looks like you’re going to get stuck in the middle of those spaces and must leave at a specific time, assert yourself and don’t let it happen.  These guys are human and will likely be stressed from the activity so be nice but don’t park there.  If it’s as busy as it could be, you may not get out for hours.

If the lot is full, overflow parking is in the neighborhood surrounding the church.  I drove around today and it seemed like a decent neighborhood.  I wouldn’t be overly concerned however be respectful-Do not block anyone’s driveway!  I don’t want the church to get any complaints caused by one of our family or friends.

Also, with the possible high attendance, I would recommend that you drop your passengers off at the church before finding a parking space in the neighborhood.  If the lot is NOT full, ignore these instructions.  Do not drop your passengers-you may impede traffic.

There are about six handicapped spaces.  If you have a Disabled placard, I know you feel entitled but don’t expect these spaces to be open.  I know for a fact that there are many attendees that have such a placard.  Remember how it was before you got the placard.  Be just like everyone else and get there early disabled people!

Do not park on La Palma Avenue!  It’s a no parking zone on both sides.

I HIGHLY recommend carpooling!  If you drive up by yourself, I’ll do my best to embarrass you before I do my eulogy.

Finally and most importantly, if you see a space labeled “RESERVED FOR SEAN”, don’t even think about parking there.  It’s saved for a humorless guy that’s too stupid to heed the “get there early” philosophy.